we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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