Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
