Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
