I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
