It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
