no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
