That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
North Korea, Best Korea!
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
