She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
