who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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