Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
