it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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