Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
