is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
