So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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