And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
