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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (707): View more from California

  I wish your snatch was here

  (443): View more from Maryland

  If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you

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• (914): View more from New York

  So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  "Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (607): View more from New York

  I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.

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