i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I want to fling myself into the sun
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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