Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
