you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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