You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
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