Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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