I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
