The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
