TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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