i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
