those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize