singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
be right there i have to get my cape
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
