fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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