Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
