Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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