so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
