So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
