do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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