doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
