He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
