i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Randomize
