There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
