does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
