it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
