So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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