R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
