i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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