You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Panties = found
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
