Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I can text with my tongue
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
