i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
