it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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