hell yes lets make some ravioli
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
