What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
