Buhtt sex?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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