Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
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