i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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